


Where is your boy tonight?

by falloutboiruto



Category: Boruto: Naruto Next Generations
Genre: Crack, Gen, basically a filler episode, middle school shenanigans, set during the ghost arc so mitsuki doesn't know how to person yet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-01-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 15:55:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22439887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/falloutboiruto/pseuds/falloutboiruto
Summary: During the good old early days at the Ninja Academy, Boruto and Mitsuki are tasked with raising an egg son together. This goes poorly.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> idk fam
> 
> beta read by @reaperduckling  
> title from: grand theft autumn/where is your boy by fall out boy
> 
> warning for vague descriptions of worm dissecting in the beginning

Biology class at the Ninja Academy wasn’t _just_ about dissecting worms, but to be completely honest it was mostly about worm dissection. Ever since Mitsuki had moved to Konoha just a short while ago, Boruto’s table had gotten way more efficient at it. Boruto found it slightly disturbing how good his new friend was with a scalpel, but getting good grades because of it wasn’t unwelcome. Schoolwork wasn't nearly as exciting to focus on as solving the mystery of the Ghost Incidents. There had been several cases just in the last week-

“Ew, ew, ew!” Inojin protested. "Do you _have to_ do that, Mitsuki?”

“It’s just the innards,” Mitsuki said, stretching his arm to grab a pair of tweezers. “I dissected way more complicated organisms at home with my parent.”

Shikadai captured Boruto’s attention and theatrically rolled his eyes. _Mitsuki is a weirdo_ , was the implication. Well, to be fair, Shikadai was right. Mitsuki really was weird. But Boruto had already befriended him and that meant sticking to being his lab partner and respecting his extreme talent at gross things. Even if that meant that the rest of the group didn’t mesh as well as before.

Their next assignment of the day turned out to be very different, though. They split up into pairs of two(Boruto strategically chose Mitsuki because otherwise, he'd be alone) and were handed… an egg? Shino-sensei explained that they would have to decorate the egg and carry it around for a day, to simulate the experience of caring for a child. Boruto did most of the work on the decorating, as Mitsuki had no creative direction at all.

“Just do what you think is right,” Mitsuki said. “So, what do you want to name it?”

“Uh, Egg Boy?” Boruto snorted. It was a _very_ corny name, but Mitsuki seemed to love it.

“Egg Boy is a beautiful name,” he said in a manner both vacant and intensively hyper-focused at the same time.

Boruto scratched his cheek, suddenly awkward. “Eh, it was kind of a joke...”

“Oh. I don’t understand jokes,” Mitsuki’s eyes flickered to the side, avoiding direct eye contact like always.

And thus, the egg was named Egg Boy.

-

In the school cafeteria, Egg Boy sitting atop their table along with the rest of their friend groups much more haphazardly decorated eggs. Egg Boy was kind of cute, come to think of it.

-

By the time school was out for the day, Boruto had certainly grown accustomed to Egg Boy’s stupid drawn on face and corny name.

“Do you want to take Egg Boy to the park?” he asked Mitsuki.

“Why?” Mitsuki wrinkled his brows together in confusion. “Sure, I guess.”

-

When they well had gotten to the park, Boruto grabbed Egg Boy from his pocket but somehow fumbled and the egg fell on to the ground, as if in slow motion, and cracked into a thousand pieces.

“No! No, no, NOOOO!!!” Boruto cried, scrambling down to the pavement to pick up whatever could be saved. “I killed him! We’ve killed our boy!”

“I don’t see the problem,” Mitsuki said. “We can just secretly replace him with another egg.”

“Nothing can replace Egg Boy! How can you even suggest that?!” Boruto cradled the sticky remains of Egg Boy in his hands. “You’re a monster, Mitsuki!”

“Maybe so. But if we want to get a passing grade, we have to. But I don’t care either way, it’s up to you. Now choose.”

_Five Seconds Later_

"We have gathered here today to not only mourn but also celebrate the life of Egg Boy," Boruto said solemnly. “May the angels sing you to rest, my… boy.” He crouched down and started covering what was once Egg Boy with dirt. Burying him in a nearby flowerbed had seemed the most… dignified.

"I liked it when we decorated him. It was interesting," Mitsuki said. “Oh look, a bird.”

“I’ll miss you so much….” Boruto sniffed, not even glancing backward. "May these flowers grow into bigger flowers and never wither, just like my love for Egg Boy will never die. I love you, Egg Boy. Goodbye."

“Wow, that’s a really big bird. I didn’t think they lived in this region.”

“How can you be talking about birds at a time like this?” Boruto snapped and turned to face Mitsuki, but instead of seeing the face of his insensitive sort-of friend he got a faceful of feathers and a smack from a strong pair of wings. Clumsily he somersaulted to the side, and when he looked up he saw that a giant seagull had jousted him away from Egg Boy’s grave and was currently…

“Noooooo!!! It’s eating him! Oh my god!” Boruto leaped forward, trying to wrestle the bird away from Egg Boy's remains, but the bird attacked him. “No, no, no! Not my shoes!” But it was too late. The bird flew away, leaving behind only eggshells and a poop stain on his left shoe.

“It’s gone now,” Mitsuki said, _unhelpfully_.

“I know that! Why didn’t you help me?”

“I wanted to see what would happen. I only intervene when you’re in actual danger.”

“Ugh— do you have a napkin?” Boruto took Mitsuki’s silent stare as a definite no, and he wiped the stain off his shoes with a nearby leaf. He drew a few short, shuddery breaths.

“Are you still sad about Egg Boy?” Mitsuki asked. “Or did the adrenaline get it out of your system?”

Boruto was about to snap back but realized it was accurate. “I guess I feel better now?”

“Good. I don’t know how to handle your emotions.”

“ _Thanks_ ,” Boruto snarked. “What are we going to do now, then?”

“Replace the egg.”

“But that’s cheating!”

”I can’t believe you’d take this so seriously,” Mitsuki said, staring at him disbelievingly. “Based on your previous behavior I thought you were just going to goof off at this assignment. However, that’s the thing that’s so interesting about you—your unpredictability. I admire that.”

“Thanks buddy!” Boruto squeaked uncomfortably, not sure if that was a compliment or not. “You too?”

“You’re lying, I’m nothing like you,” Mitsuki said, the sudden smile on his face coming across as very disingenuous and out of place. “But what I’d like to know is if you are willing to risk a failing grade because of a pesky moral dilemma?”

_Well, always a pleasure talking to you…?_

Boruto cleared his throat several times to gather his thoughts. “Well, ahem, _anyways_ … I guess we can always get a new egg from my house, and try to replicate Egg Boy’s design? I did most of the artwork on that anyways. Mom always has eggs in the fridge, it’ll be fine.”

“Oh. I’ve heard that mothers often cook. I don’t understand why.”

“Well, someone has to cook, at least. Got to get food to eat somehow, y’know.”

“Is eating a necessity?”

 _Ugh, this conversation was getting them nowhere._ “I’ll just bring a new egg to school tomorrow,” Boruto said while shrugging, already waving goodbye. “See you tomorrow, Mitsuki!”

Mitsuki responded with only a serious nod and promptly disappeared without a trace as Big Bro Konohamaru would sometimes do.

“Huh?” Boruto said. “When did he learn how to do that…?”

Maybe he could ask tomorrow.

-

Boruto was late the next day to class, as he overslept. Replicating Egg Boy's design on the new egg turned out to be very time-consuming. Mitsuki squinted at the new egg like an overzealous art critic.

“It’s a little off, but it’ll fool Shino-sensei for sure,” Mitsuki whispered.

“Shut up! He can hear us!” Boruto whispered back.

“What are you talking about back there?” Shino-sensei said. “Do you have anything to share with the class?”

“Only that our egg, Egg Boy survived the night. We have it right here.” Mitsuki said. “Look, there it is.” He held the fake Egg Boy up.

Boruto’s stomach started grumbling with the squirmy bad feelings that apparently came hand in hand with _cheating_ and _lying_.

“Let’s talk about the egg experiment,” Shino-sensei said. “How many have their eggs intact?”

Everyone in their class raised their hands.

“How many of these eggs are replacements because you broke the first one?”

Everyone except _stupid Sarada’s_ group reluctantly raised their hands.

“Oh, a twist,” Boruto heard Mitsuki mutter under his breath.

Shino-sensei walked back to his desk. “This exercise was to symbolize how incredibly clumsy you guys are! You can’t even handle an egg for a day! How could you possibly be able to handle a baby, even when you grow slightly older and become teenagers? Today we talk about—contraceptives.” Shino-sensei cleared his throat while the entire class made flustered complaining noises and held up a small item that sort of resembled an instant noodle seasoning packet, but clearly was something else.

“That’s a water balloon!” Boruto yelled before he could stop himself. “That has nothing to do with s-s-s-se-uh, _you know_ …. Y’know.”

Shino-sensei was quiet for a moment but then launched into a thorough explanation. And boy, did Boruto regret asking.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some mitsuki pov that highlights his emotions! i felt that the last chapter didn't really explain his side of things very well ^^'

Boruto really was cool. The coolest person Mitsuki had encountered in Konoha thus far, which was part of what strongly suggested that he was the Sun. But Mitsuki mustn't get ahead of himself and do his investigation properly. Just like his parent had ordered. They had said that they expected nothing but perfection, and Mitsuki was nothing but a stickler for detail. Like the detail that Boruto actually answered him most of the time when Mitsuki asked questions about regular Konohagakure life, unlike the rest of his classmates. All and all, all of the other people he had encountered didn’t seem to know what to do with him. Whenever he had asked Shino-sensei questions during class, his questions had been ‘too advanced’. When he had asked if the bathrooms in the Ninja Academy building also sometimes had snakes in them like the ones at home, he had been met with nothing but disbelieving stares and muffled laughter. Except for from Boruto.

“Mitsuki, I think the whole snakes in the toilet thing is just a joke they tell small children to scare them,” Boruto had explained, voice veering on the side of pitying. “My sister was scared of them when she was in kindergarten.”

“Oh. Not like the ones at home then. Maybe that’s for the best.” Mitsuki hadn’t been much of a fan of the ones at home. His parent had said that knowing how to handle unexpected threats were part of his training and best learned by experience. But maybe he could slack off a bit here in that regard, then.

“Yeah…” Boruto said, his eyes darting around like he was watching a game of ninja ping pong. There was this uncertain quality to his voice that Mitsuki didn’t know what to make of, but at least he was talking to him. The rest of his class had pretty much stopped after he’d been in school for a few days, probably because he hadn’t known how to talk to them either. It gave him more opportunity to focus on Boruto anyways, so it wasn’t much of a loss.

-

They were in Biology Lab, Mitsuki himself cutting up worms for the assignment. Boruto mostly poked himself in the nose like usual, and Inojin and Shikadai were playing cards under the table. Typical Biology Lab. It was way less interesting than the hushed conversations and speculations about the Ghost Incidents they'd have out of class. So, Mitsuki kept himself busy and focused on the task at hand.

But then, they were split up into pairs of two and supposed to decorate, name and care for an egg. It was, frankly, very stupid (Mitsuki didn’t want to say that though as Shino-sensei disliked him enough already).

However, Boruto seemed to get more into it as the day passed, and when he asked Mitsuki to go to the park with him(with the egg?) Mitsuki was so confused that he had to say yes. A not-so-tragic egg death/egg funeral, a wild seagull attack, and a very annoyed Boruto later, they called it quits. Mitsuki went home and stared at the walls until the sky shifted from light blue to saturated orange to dark and starry, just like all the other days before that.

Mitsuki didn’t understand what part of him had disturbed Boruto to the point of calling him a monster earlier that day, perhaps it had been the stress from losing Egg Boy that made Boruto act out so.

But it still stung.

Even later, when he was trying to go to sleep, he thought about it. Was he a monster? Mitsuki’s parent had told him that he was human, albeit a synthetically created one. However, he clearly didn’t fit in with the other human children. The only person he could even remotely communicate with was Boruto, even if the word ‘communicate’ was very strongly worded language. But what other way was there? He’d been ordered this behavior by his parent. He knew nothing else.

He just had to keep trying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> joking about toilet snakes is a thing in my country, IS IT IN YOURS???

**Author's Note:**

> please leave kudos if you liked this, and comment if you want to say something! :D


End file.
